I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
