I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Randomize