i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
So much rum. So many feels.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
