That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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