I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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