it wasn't lemon gatorade
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
50% drunk capacity currently
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
