3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
