i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
The power of my boobs compel you
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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