Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
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