Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
