there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
This beer is not sobering me up at all
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Randomize
