Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize