That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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