What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Wtf am i supposed to tell my kids when they ask about my first time? "Mommy got drunk off her ass and fucked a total stranger in another stranger's bedroom, then got abandoned by the selfish prick and walk of shamed to the nearest gas station to call a cab, but ended up passed out in a park in a pool of her own puke."
At least mommy was smart enough to use protection and hack into the asshole's facebook account.
Well of course. Mommy may be a slutty drunk but she ain't no idiot.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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