David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Randomize
