Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
