i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize