My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Randomize
