there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Randomize
