Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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