Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
The feeling are messing with the penis
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize