ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
