good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
