i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
