this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
