so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
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