Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
