Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
