Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
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