she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
