Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
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