Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Randomize