And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
