So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Randomize
