real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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