How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I intend to get homeless drunk
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize