Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Randomize
