i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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