so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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