i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
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