Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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