i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
