Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
