so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
