whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
