Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
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