THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
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