It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
