You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
