that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Randomize
